In darkness we walk; we are survivors of the night. The dark raven still flies; we fear no fright. In suffering we have been tried; blood and fierceness in our eyes. Our seasons of weeping have strengthened us; hard resolve is in our cries. Let now all in our congregation in unison rise. Let the earth’s soil remember the tears of our torment; let the four walls echo the whispers of our days and nights of agony. We have been made strong in our endless affliction; we present the dreadful scars of trauma, and the world is aghast. We have been rejected and unloved even by our own fathers; our anguish and misery is the pain of our mothers. We live in darkness like vampires; our hands outstretched longing for the sunshine, but seemingly rejected by the light. The dilation in our eyes tell the tale of our secluded existence. We are but mortals with hearts full of love and pain. Our forecast are grey skies and eternal rain. We swear now an eternal oath, that the traumas of our childhood eternally sleep and shall never rise again.
-
In frailty and with his final tears he kissed her;
In agony and through earnest whispers he said to her:
Remember me the way I was
Remember my courage
Remember my pain
Remember my love.
-
Pursuing the light
In darkness I fall
In a quiet room
Tears of silent
Agony on pillows fall
In late summer
Hopes of love fade
Before the fall— -
You will survive.
-
With many agonies
And inner pain
Through dark nights
And the dawn again
She lived with scourge
And cold dark rain
For the secrets she held
She took the blame
They called her crazy
A woman insane
The vilest among them
Even cursed her name
Until that day an angel came
And said to her;
In you I see the same
It was not your fault
You are not to blame
Within you is light
And a hidden flame
My daughter be at peace
And let healing reign
Suffer no more
And break the chains
The world is yours
For blessed is your name
Embrace your light
And live again. -
In a winter’s breath
You said,
“I love you”
With every breath
My soul desires you;
Breathe life into me
Once more
Resurrect me from
The hell of lonely torment;
See the desires of my heart
Forever let me relive
That moment. -
A stranger propositions her
And she accepts with a smile.
Her body dances loudly
But quietly her spirit cries;
See her deep wounds;
See the torment in her eyes.
She earns her money —
But every time,
The depths of her are left behind. -
In my nakedness
The truth is revealed;
I am cold.
I am desolate. -
In her he finds comfort. In her he can have a moment’s peace.
-
I am a child of the night
Hear my growls of hunger
See the pain that I suffer
Witness the eyes that have
Seen what can never be unseen
Hear my cries
Look into my soul and see
The dark secrets that
I withhold from my mother
See my tears and the hurt
That I daily suffer
Witness the pain inflicted
By a real life monster
Who causes great harm
And nights of insomnia
Record my dreams of
being a bird in flight
And escaping the torture
See the scars on my mind
And on my soul
Witness the physical and mental
Trauma that takes a double toll
See the land of peace
That my mind has devised
Where there is no more pain
Only love and clear blue skies
Hear the screams that awaken
Me at night
The bad dreams, the fear, the fright
See my Christmas list to Santa for toys,
And for the suffering to go away
To be accepted by my peers at school
who tell me I’m not wanted,
And exclude me from their play
See my poverty and the laughter in class
From boys and girls of a different class
Feel my anger and feel my pain
Feel my sadness walking home in the rain
See my ideations of not wanting
To be here anymore
Looking at cars go by
Wishing I wasn’t poor
See the feelings of pain
And revenge that I hide
That I’ve never told, and eat me up inside
This cold cold world is no place for a child
I’m sorry I have to go; the street lights are on
Mom says I have to come inside.
Intimate Compositions 