In that moment she was set free,
And shed tears of joy in quiet peace.
She inhaled deeply the memories of agony
And with eyes of fire,
Exhaled agony in her final release.
Antonio Vivaldi: Nisi Dominus, RV 608. No.4
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The winds of stormy seas blow against my tears. I wildly dance in trance like state in the dusk of the twilight. The sand is cool beneath my feet. A fire is lit. Tonight I commune with the stars and the night’s sky. I will sup and make merry as if you were here with me. The memory of your beauty and smile elevate me in euphoric reminisce. The way you touched me and the length and scent of your hair lead to feelings inside me that cannot be expressed in words or writings even by the most eloquent of orator and writer. The most expressive works of literature could hardly grasp or capture, the feelings of you.
My love, I am caught up in your rapture; in my flesh I am constrained to dwell here in this wilted existence and cold world without your warmth. Echo my name in dreams and reach for me. Illuminate me in your loving light and release me from my torment. For what is living or what is life without you? I live on in your memory. I love you. I will always love you. I hope you can hear me.
-
In my spirit I was unhappy
But you told me you loved me,
And my desire for you blinded me
With false affirmation of sincerity;
What freed me was the discovery
Of your deceit and hypocrisy. -
In darkness we walk; we are survivors of the night. The dark raven still flies; we fear no fright. In suffering we have been tried; blood and fierceness in our eyes. Our seasons of weeping have strengthened us; hard resolve is in our cries. Let now all in our congregation in unison rise. Let the earth’s soil remember the tears of our torment; let the four walls echo the whispers of our days and nights of agony. We have been made strong in our endless affliction; we present the dreadful scars of trauma, and the world is aghast. We have been rejected and unloved even by our own fathers; our anguish and misery is the pain of our mothers. We live in darkness like vampires; our hands outstretched longing for the sunshine, but seemingly rejected by the light. The dilation in our eyes tell the tale of our secluded existence. We are but mortals with hearts full of love and pain. Our forecast are grey skies and eternal rain. We swear now an eternal oath, that the traumas of our childhood eternally sleep and shall never rise again.
-
In frailty and with his final tears he kissed her;
In agony and through earnest whispers he said to her:
Remember me the way I was
Remember my courage
Remember my pain
Remember my love.
-
Pursuing the light
In darkness I fall
In a quiet room
Tears of silent
Agony on pillows fall
In late summer
Hopes of love fade
Before the fall— -
With many agonies
And inner pain
Through dark nights
And the dawn again
She lived with scourge
And cold dark rain
For the secrets she held
She took the blame
They called her crazy
A woman insane
The vilest among them
Even cursed her name
Until that day an angel came
And said to her;
In you I see the same
It was not your fault
You are not to blame
Within you is light
And a hidden flame
My daughter be at peace
And let healing reign
Suffer no more
And break the chains
The world is yours
For blessed is your name
Embrace your light
And live again.
