In my nakedness
The truth is revealed;
I am cold.
I am desolate.
Tag: Writing
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I am a child of the night
Hear my growls of hunger
See the pain that I suffer
Witness the eyes that have
Seen what can never be unseen
Hear my cries
Look into my soul and see
The dark secrets that
I withhold from my mother
See my tears and the hurt
That I daily suffer
Witness the pain inflicted
By a real life monster
Who causes great harm
And nights of insomnia
Record my dreams of
being a bird in flight
And escaping the torture
See the scars on my mind
And on my soul
Witness the physical and mental
Trauma that takes a double toll
See the land of peace
That my mind has devised
Where there is no more pain
Only love and clear blue skies
Hear the screams that awaken
Me at night
The bad dreams, the fear, the fright
See my Christmas list to Santa for toys,
And for the suffering to go away
To be accepted by my peers at school
who tell me I’m not wanted,
And exclude me from their play
See my poverty and the laughter in class
From boys and girls of a different class
Feel my anger and feel my pain
Feel my sadness walking home in the rain
See my ideations of not wanting
To be here anymore
Looking at cars go by
Wishing I wasn’t poor
See the feelings of pain
And revenge that I hide
That I’ve never told, and eat me up inside
This cold cold world is no place for a child
I’m sorry I have to go; the street lights are on
Mom says I have to come inside. -
What is life that we should live it?
What is suffering that we should bear it?
The crow walks along on a long wire
And stares at me as if acknowledging my pain;
The heavens open and release a frightful,
And thunderous rain—
My god, what a glorious wonder;
On sentimental midnight talks of love
Hearts are torn asunder—
Am I not worthy?
Am I not a man who has sought peace
On mornings early?
The frightful thoughts invade and subdue—
In my hour of panic I see intimate visions of you;
You were my world and my only love—
Pure and incorruptible;
You brought from within me a lost smile,
And took away all my troubles—
The harshness of life cares not about
The matters of love and of the heart;
I am lost in desolation and utter dryness—
I am a man in need of water, whispering
Strange utterances and stumbling aimlessly
In the wilderness.
Who will hear my cry?
In our moments of turmoil on somber nights
My love, you would cry;
My angel, let us together release our hurt and pain.
For your hurt is my hurt, and your sorrow my sorrow.
I dreamed of you in rows of
Lavender, fuchsia, purple, yellow and blue.
I had seen you my angel coming from the heavens
To resurrect me from the death of melancholy,
And lonely despair;
Your gleaming white wings spread and comforted me.
In your warmth I was wrapped up—
The potency of your love healed me;
Your smile and laughter brought me back to life;
The indescribable feelings that I feel
Rise up within my spirit tonight—
If you only knew my heart still belonged to you;
If you could only see my desires deep within …
I love you;
I long for you. -
In weeping I have found my strength;
In suffering I have found my endurance.
The world may burn
but my feet shall not be scorched.
Like seagrass I will move to and fro
in violent tides but shall be at peace.
In my weariness I will remember
The comfort of my mother;
In my darkness I will unrepentantly
And angrily curse the name of my father.
I shall be uninhibited; I will not be contained;
I shall not be swayed;
Like a giant oak tree I shall stand
Alone in sprawling glory.
I will not wither, but thrive.
I will not fold, but flourish.
Precious memories will sustain me,
And the love in my heart shall nourish me.
Vile words and bad intentions
Shall not prevail against me.
I am a mangrove forest anchored in deep waters.
Like the Harpy Eagle,
I will be extremely focused and resolved.
I will not be shaken;
I shall not be bound. -
Kiss me and move my spirit;
I love you with a love I can hardly fathom.
Move my heart in winter’s tempest
And touch my soul on warm summer nights.
The heavens know I would die for you;
Together we have walked the path of love and sorrow;
You are my angel —
Your white wings are spread and I am comforted;
Only you know my hurt and my deep pain.
Caress my face and bring me back to life.
If I should die, let me die telling you that I love you;
Your tears of joy move me to emotion,
And we cry together.
Let us not be separated in this life or the next;
Neither strife, nor blight, nor hardship, nor suffering,
Nor whispers, nor lies,
nor the cast of unapproving eyes ever separate us.
Ours is a marriage of the heart and soul;
We look into each other’s eyes,
And our vows are exchanged in silent intimacy,
And everlasting passion.
We are our own rings;
We are our own symbols of love.
Let us lie together and please each other
Without inhibition and with extreme intent;
Your beauty is akin to a flawless natural blue diamond;
I will savor the rareness of you. Forever I love you. -
Dark stillness abounds but still restful sleep seems to evade.
Tears run on soft pillows; the agony of the dark early morning
inflicts even more anxiety than the night before. Light is sought
but dark curtains are drawn to shield the eyes from the pain of
slow adjustment. Weary eyes have become accustomed to
the darkness. The years of praying no longer suffice. An existence
is what is left … he wants to live again … he wants to touch the sky.The darkness plagues unmercifully and darkens dreams.
The suffering increases slowly year after year. The seasons come
and go, and he has forgotten his age. Turmoil is made manifest
in the frailty of his body. He remembers the comfort of his mother,
and yearns for her presence; to comfort himself he whispers
her favorite hymns. He’s become a vampire that wants embrace
the light again, but will the light accept him or confine him to
eternal darkness? He takes a shower to start the day. -
See me now.
See me in my wretchedness;
See me in my pain.
See the eyes that have seen struggle,
And the nights of dark rain.
See me in my anxiety;
See me in my tears;
See the toll of heavy burdens
I have carried over the years.
See the life that is within me;
See the deep hurt that I carry daily.
See me in tattered clothes on the street
Begging passersby for money.
See me in abject poverty;
See my illness that is invisible to many.
See me sleeping on church steps in the winter;
See me wishing for peace and eternal slumber.
See my hopes and see my dreams;
See me in linen white
Resurrected in light by a peaceful stream. -
In your eyes I wanted to be a good son. In my eyes you were a god.
In a sea of black a young boy sits quietly in solid oak church pews.
Young eyes stare at stillness as it lies. The agony of reality encompasses
Like tall waves in dark seas.
In that moment your last words are remembered:“You are a good son”
Tears fall.
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The orchestra weeps. The lead violinist cries tears of blood.
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I am perturbed; the underbelly of the darkness disturbs. The wantonness of man is manifest in the foul smelling mire of blackness deep within the soul. The chambers of the heart are corroded with unbridled wickedness and deceit. The beast of envy roams unceasingly devouring the light. Angry spirits seek peace to unload their burden of hatred. The world spins on its axis as the winds of hell seek to blow her inhabitants into the abyss of no return. The angels descend in the hundreds of millions and spread their wings to shield the earth. Roaming souls eerily moan; the sorrowful cry out to release their pain; the underworld is shaken.
Heaven hears their cries, but Hades laughs in sinister iniquity. Lady justice swings her sword in blind fury. Gold leaf weaved through her long hair and a gleaming white robe is her adornment. Fire burns within me. The dark crow looks on. We are fragile. We are all weighed in the balance. The hearts of men reveal their innermost secrets as they are seen in blue light. The hour is upon us.
Leviathan swims the deepest and darkest waters. Tears of the tormented saturate the earth. Her soil is rich with their memories. The testament of the sorrowful and tormented are recorded in the book of blood and tears; they will be restored in joy and happiness; they will be resurrected anew in light. A child is born in his mother’s agony. She screams as life is pushed through her womb; he has made it from darkness into the light. In the night’s sky Polaris shines in prominence. Let the journey begin.
Intimate Compositions 