In my flesh I am but a mortal in darkness searching for perpetual light.
Afraid of the darkness no more I will survive the night.
Tag: Life
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The winds of stormy seas blow against my tears. I wildly dance in trance like state in the dusk of the twilight. The sand is cool beneath my feet. A fire is lit. Tonight I commune with the stars and the night’s sky. I will sup and make merry as if you were here with me. The memory of your beauty and smile elevate me in euphoric reminisce. The way you touched me and the length and scent of your hair lead to feelings inside me that cannot be expressed in words or writings even by the most eloquent of orator and writer. The most expressive works of literature could hardly grasp or capture, the feelings of you.
My love, I am caught up in your rapture; in my flesh I am constrained to dwell here in this wilted existence and cold world without your warmth. Echo my name in dreams and reach for me. Illuminate me in your loving light and release me from my torment. For what is living or what is life without you? I live on in your memory. I love you. I will always love you. I hope you can hear me.
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In my spirit I was unhappy
But you told me you loved me,
And my desire for you blinded me
With false affirmation of sincerity;
What freed me was the discovery
Of your deceit and hypocrisy. -
In darkness we walk; we are survivors of the night. The dark raven still flies; we fear no fright. In suffering we have been tried; blood and fierceness in our eyes. Our seasons of weeping have strengthened us; hard resolve is in our cries. Let now all in our congregation in unison rise. Let the earth’s soil remember the tears of our torment; let the four walls echo the whispers of our days and nights of agony. We have been made strong in our endless affliction; we present the dreadful scars of trauma, and the world is aghast. We have been rejected and unloved even by our own fathers; our anguish and misery is the pain of our mothers. We live in darkness like vampires; our hands outstretched longing for the sunshine, but seemingly rejected by the light. The dilation in our eyes tell the tale of our secluded existence. We are but mortals with hearts full of love and pain. Our forecast are grey skies and eternal rain. We swear now an eternal oath, that the traumas of our childhood eternally sleep and shall never rise again.
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You will survive.
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With many agonies
And inner pain
Through dark nights
And the dawn again
She lived with scourge
And cold dark rain
For the secrets she held
She took the blame
They called her crazy
A woman insane
The vilest among them
Even cursed her name
Until that day an angel came
And said to her;
In you I see the same
It was not your fault
You are not to blame
Within you is light
And a hidden flame
My daughter be at peace
And let healing reign
Suffer no more
And break the chains
The world is yours
For blessed is your name
Embrace your light
And live again. -
In a winter’s breath
You said,
“I love you”
With every breath
My soul desires you;
Breathe life into me
Once more
Resurrect me from
The hell of lonely torment;
See the desires of my heart
Forever let me relive
That moment. -
In her he finds comfort. In her he can have a moment’s peace.
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For lost loves and broken hearts
For the sufferers and torn apart
For wonderful dreams and peaceful streams
For the intimate moments we hold sacred in our memory
For the survivors
For the resilience of depressed single mothers
For the hopes and dreams of loving fathers
For the time you told me I was a good son
For the time I told you I loved you more than anything in this world
For Julia, Alvara, Herminio, Viveca, Howard, and Esmeralda
For making me a drink and sharing a cigarette with me when I was in tears
For loving me for the time you did
For the love I poured out unconditionally to all I’ve loved
For Sandy and the time we rode the 2 train to Grand Concourse
For summers in New York
For the pizza shop around the corner from Burke Avenue that sold the best slices
For my grandmother
For my mother
For the promise I swore to myself at an early age not to be a non-existent father
For the first time I told you I loved you, and meant it with all my heart
For understanding and genuine compassion
For the anguished who think they can’t hold on any longer but always find a way out
For those who are gone and dearly beloved, whose memories will live on forever
For Irish coffees at any time of day and good cigars
For the lonely and the pursuit of genuine love
For the tired and weary who take long rides on city buses to make a living
For the victims of abuse
For the homeless who quietly cry in dark abandoned buildings in sleeping bags on cold nights
For all of us. -
As the small
Yellow pills wear off
Thus begins his
Descent into hell.
Intimate Compositions 